all about ciidem

i think i need my wisdom teeth removed... along with some stuff in my memory... so that my brain can be defragmented and work somewhat more properly. asap. this unnecessary stuff does not move me from a to b. everyone else seems to have moved on. wisdom. lily sings and i listen.

i like sebnem ferah (she is a turkish singer) a lot. most teenagers including me (hahahaah!) think that she is so cool. i find most of her songs very good, both music and lyrics. i stumbled upon the following translation of one of her songs on the web:

i lived such a life that / öyle bir hayat yaşadım ki
i have seen heaven and hell, too / cenneti de gördüm cehennemi de
i lived such a love that / öyle bir aşk yaşadım ki
i have seen passion and giving up, too / tutkuyu da gördüm pes etmeyi de
while some were watching the life in the front row / bazıları seyrederken hayatı en önden
i found a scene for myself and acted / kendime bir sahne buldum oynadım
they gave me such a role that / öyle bir rol vermişler ki
i read and read but couldnt understand it / okudum okudum anlamadım
sometimes i talked to myself in my home / kendi kendime konuştum bazen evimde
i was angry and also laughed at the way i was / hem kızdım hem güldüm halime
then i said "promise to yourself" / sonra dedim ki \"söz ver kendine\"

if you love seas, you should also love waves / denizleri seviyorsan, dalgaları da seveceksin
if you want to be loved, first you should know how to love / sevilmek istiyorsan, önce sevmeyi bileceksin
if you love flying, you should also know how to fall / uçmayı seviyorsan, düşmeyi de bileceksin
if you live with fears, you may only watch life / korkarak yaşıyorsan, yanlızca hayatı seyredersin

i lived such a life that / öyle bir hayat yaşadım ki
i knew last trips(means:death) early / son yolculukları erken tanıdım
How precious the time was / öyle çok değerliymiş ki zaman
My hurrying up was due to that, i got it / hep acele etmem bundan anladım

(courtesy of the anonymous translator)

i think this is a pretty good translation. i heard that there was a speculation that nietsche had written this poem but that was just not true. go sebnem, write more lyrics, make more music, cheer me up! :)

i was checking out one of my friends' blog and i found his post about this website. imho, lesson 22 is pretty hilarious. this guy knows his stuff :)

today i saw this movie with one of my friends. we both did not know what to expect, it could be pretty good or blah. it basically is about a man that lives in a place where lies do not exist and everyone tells the truth and their honest opinions about anything, people trust each other... long story short, the exact opposite of this world and its complicated politics. our man somehow starts to lie and abuse everything someone can think of. good thing, he is not a bad guy, just an average homo sapien. so the world in the movie does not fall into a hell hole. he falls in love and fights for her girl etc. the film makes a lot of references to religion concept in general and the way it is institutionalized. overall, it is neither a bad movie nor a must-see in my opinion. the idea of setting up a lie-less world is an interesting start but there was something...umm...repulsive (i guess this is the right word) i can not exactly tell. maybe the acting. i do not know. anyway, i laughed, i stole 2 hours from my busy schedule and that is all what matters!!! :)

on friday, we were talking about the movies with the gals and of course we started to talk about how good a movie avatar was. i guess, since i am not quite depression-free nowadays, v told me to wait a little bit more to see avatar. but some of my other friends strongly recommended this movie and especially watching it in 3d before i miss the chance to see it in the movie theaters now. anyway, maybe next week i might go and see this piece of animation art!

speaking of movies, this song is from the soundtrack of a very good movie that also made me a little depressed. even though not a shiny happy one, good movie; good soundtrack, good song, good times. period.

okay this is the big one. one big advice from me to myself: be cool. just stop for a while and remember.

i do not know if i will have enough time and motivation to post here regularly but here i start.
3 days to new year, my first post...

my new year resolutions

never forget your health is the most important thing
sleep 8 hours a day
exercise more, run/jog more
travel
watch more movies, especially classics; listen to good music you have not heard before; dance more; take more photographs
submit the paper to the conference and to the journal
giggle less, find another coping mechanism but it should not be crying
learn to say no
be fair, give everyone what they deserve, no more no less
remember you can not control everything, get rid of your control freakness
do not forget not everything is your fault/due to your nature, personality or past
accept things as they are
do not try to be perfect because you never was and you never will be
try to be the best ciidem you can...